Thursday, October 16, 2008

single white female

ok, you remember that movie w/ bridget fonda and that other girl right? the one where bridget puts an ad in the paper for a roommate and this girl moves in and slowly starts taking over her identity?

well, this is going on in my office. one of my friends, lollipop, is a very stylish, snappy dresser. she always looks put together, nails done, hair done, blah blah. and not in a "my shit doesn't stink" kind of way if you know what i mean. she's cool. (and i totally just told her about my blog today!)

then there is ditto. lord, i can't even begin to tell you about ditto because most of the time she gets on my last fucking nerve. i work very very closely with her. she is one of those women who sort of looks like she was rode hard and put up wet. she needs a verbal editor. in meetings she repeats things over and over again. she goes on and on and monopolizes every conversation she is in. i digress.

ditto thinks she is as stylish as lollipop (fail--she's totally not--this is a woman who wears...wait for it....WHITE TIGHTS/PANTYHOSE....ALL THE TIME). ok, i quit wearing those in 1988 folks.

this summer ditto cut her hair to resemble lollipop's. lollipop got a different haircut. ditto soon did too. ditto is always commenting on lollipop's clothes as well. i mean yes, from time to time you might tell a friend, hey, that's a cool outfit or you look good in that color or whatev, but you aren't like, hey, where did you get that cos i want to get one exactly like it and in the same color and everything. (it should be noted that lollipop is much hotter than ditto ever thought about being and though she might THINK she has the body to wear the same clothes lolli wears, she doesn't.) i'm just sayin'.

so today--as we're outside having a smoke break, lolli is talking about clothes she's giving to goodwill etc. and ditto is like hey, give them to me. lolli was perfectly nice but i could totally tell she probably wanted to say (if she was evil like me) bitch!! get your own fucking style and quit trying to be me.

at that moment, when ditto asked for lolli's cast offs, i thought--holy hell this is just like that movie single white female.

lolli needs to watch her back!

5 comments:

Trish said...

Sometimes I feel sorry for Ditto. She's one of those women who doesn't have any girl friends and she considers US her gf's. Then I remember, you have to know how to BE a friend to HAVE a friend. Then I feel sorry for her because, for whatever reason, she doesn't know how to BE a friend. Then I don't care because I don't think she is capable of learning the concept.

Kristin.... said...

She sounds a bit off. People are so weird.

Sherendipity said...

There are a few people in my office that I wish would be like ditto. At least then, they might shower once in a while.

creative kerfuffle said...

trish--that's just because you are truly a nice person. you are kind hearted and give people the benefit of the doubt.

update--ditto has now changed from drinking diet mt. dew to diet coke (cos that's what lolli drinks!)

Astarte said...

What a fruitcake!!! She sounds socially challenged, in a serious and sad way. This is probably her way of trying to make friends or something. Too bad there's not an adult version of Mathletes or anything!