Thursday, August 23, 2007

woe is me

big t made the comment that i haven't blogged in forever and i told her if i blogged right now it would basically be venting and bitching. but we all know how i love to vent and bitch and write so here you go.

first i must say that my last post started out saying i was drinking an iced coffee. as i'm typing now i'm drinking a caramel machiato. : ) love me some starbucks. drinking coffee because i pulled a hubs move and went shopping for his birthday the night before his birthday. sad. i knew what i wanted to get but hadn't had a chance to do so. it's sad that birthdays aren't more special when you're a grown up. i've neglected two friends' birthdays this summer and i hate that. well, i did have dinner w/ big t on her's (we were in vegas for work though). my sweet friend ts' bday was earlier this month and i didn't even think to call her.

ok so my last post i was sleeping in a shoe box in ny. since then i came home, spent two more nights alone w/ the hubs and then we headed to wv to pick up the kids.

we drove the rental (kia sorrento which was pretty cool) to wv and the hubs tried out an early birthday gift from one of his customers. the guy gave him a gps. the hubs was quite excited, though he said he felt odd accepting such as expensive gift, it's the only time a guy has bought him something so extravagant. anyway, the first day he got it he called me like 20 times telling me what it was doing. i wasn't as enthralled as he was but we used it on the trip to wv and it was pretty cool. granted, i know the way home, but it was cool to know that all these years we've pretty much been taking the most direct route.

we spent the weekend at auntie's which was really great because we hadn't seen them since my cousin's wedding in november. the weather was perfect that saturday. my other aunt, the one that kept the kids was camping so we went to the campground saturday afternoon. it actually got chilly out there sitting around the campfire. it was great though. i had to laugh because "camping" to my aunts is a camper with electricity, tv, beds etc. and my cousin hooked them up w/ satellite tv. oh, and they have a golf cart. i drove a golf cart for the first time in my life. that was pretty fun. the kids drove it too, of course they loved it. i couldn't help but wonder how much fun my grandma would have had with a golf cart back in the heyday when they all went camping.

we watched a dvd of family reunions/christmas' while we were there. since we've never lived close we never made it to wv for the big all family holiday thing. we're talking cousins you don't even know etc. they all get together at someone's house and there is a santa and gifts etc. it was fun and sad to watch. the glue of all of that i think was my grandma and her sisters, all of whom are gone now. but my mom's generation carries on the tradition. some of the years on the dvd included my grandma. even now, almost seven years (has it really been that long?) after her death, it choked me up to see her on the tv screen.

ahem, ok, moving on. so we made it home sunday evening. yeah us.

the boy was wheezing and coughing so the hubs took him to the ER. allergies. they gave him a breathing treatment and put him on steroids for three days. of course as soon was we walked in the door from the car trip we had to bathe rebel. i don't know if i'm being a good pet owner or not, he's pushing 17 years old and he's just falling apart. he's a long hair cat and apparently had some bathroom issues while we were gone. the poor guy was a mess. so we got that cleaned up, boy to the ER and then started trying to figure out how to juggle the kids this week since daycare is closed.

we traded them off and on on monday. tuesday the hubs had them w/ him driving to lenior. he called about 10 am, the boy had thrown up in the car. mmmm fun. so he went home, peptoed him up and he was fine the rest of the day. wed. and today i worked from home with them.

tomorrow, the hubs' birthday, we're splitting them again. saturday donut and ninja are coming over to hang out with them while we have a date (for our birthday) and sunday we're having the family over for cake and ice cream.

now, our biggest issue goes to press on monday so in the middle of all of this life stuff going on i'm having one of the busiest work weeks. oh and i have two trips coming up, the one to germany is a pain in the ass. so far i've spent about 3 hours on our corporate travel site trying to figure out how to get from here to there on the days i need to without spending 12 hours in detroit or ny. god i so wish i didn't have to take that fucking trip, not this year, not now.

i think whoever said that fucking stupid comment that god only gives you what you can handle should be shot. because i'll tell you what---I CAN'T HANDLE ONE MORE FUCKING THING!

oh, i forgot another thing that happened during our goat rodeo last two weeks. while we were in wv the hubs backed the rental car into a pole : ) yes, him, not me. just a tiny little spot that he covered w/ white out. oh, and a cigarette burn in the carpet and of course the aroma of throw up. of course it could have been worse. the day we went to wv my cousin was hit by a deer. yes, the deer sideswiped his saturn and torn the hell out of it. there was deer hair/skin (dna the girl said) still in the cracks of the car, all along the side of it. i almost puked. so, i guess a pole is better than a deer.

i miss my friends i miss my quiet life i miss my routine. the way i'm looking at it right now it will be the middle of september before we have any semblance or normalcy. then i sink further into depression and think this is the way my life is going to be as long as i'm in this job. great benefits are pretty much the only thing keeping me where i am. how do you walk away from good health insurance and a pension plan you pay nothing into? on the other hand, i don't know if i can survive staying put until i retire.

i'm seriously thinking i might need to be medicated.


Anonymous said...

Hang in there, sweetie! Look forward to your date night and take deep, relaxing breaths. You'll get through it all.

"Sweet" TS :)

Unknown said...

Thank you for not mentioning how trashed I got on my birthday in Vegas! - Big T

Anonymous said...

A birthday date sound like a good idea. Also, you should always enjoy your job more than what it gives you for pay or benefits. We all spend more time at the office than with our families, so when you are home you don't want to still think about a job.