Happy Friday

I'm in such a good mood today, thank you very much. It's Friday evening--love Friday evenings because there isn't a rush to get things done, dinner, homework, baths, scouts---it's just so much more relaxed. I got a butt load of stuff done at work today, though it still looks like something exploded on my desk. The office closed early for the three day weekend and it is simply amazing how much stuff you can actually accomplish when bosses aren't asking for this or that. Damn them.

One thing I like about my job and the one I had before is the friends I've made. I have three people in particular that I met through work, interviewed for stories and have become great friends with. TL and his family are one. We don't get to email as much as we used to but I heard from him and his sis's this week--love those people. I'm incredibly jealous of TL though--next March he's doing a marathon in...wait for it....Antarctica! Yes, he's taking my dream trip, well, except for the running part : ) This summer he's running in Rio. He's also ran a marathon on the Great Wall. How awesome is that? Despite the fact that he lives on the left coast we're family--his is as screwed up as mine : ) We are the only sane ones in our families, OK, a couple of his sisters are cool and my brother is cool but otherwise we're kindred spirits.

Another of my friends from this job is coming to my conference. She is just way cool too and we hit it off right away. She's one of those people that you meet and feel like you've been friends for years. My other friends are actually from two jobs ago, same type of business, and I love them to death too. They come to town once and year and even The Hubs enjoys hanging out with him. I think it's because he and one of the women were separated at birth, eerie how much they're alike.

I cooked dinner tonight : ) OK, I do it occasionally but have discovered if you put some Motown in the CD player and sing and dance while you're cooking it goes much better. I just hate the coming up with what to cook part, that really sucks.

Oh, I got poison ivy again. Dammit. I should have known better. I weed eated this past weekend (is that even correct grammar? or should be I used the weed eater? ) You'd think, being as allergic to the stuff as I am, that I'd be able to recognize and stay away from it. But nooooo, not me. I got a shot, big shot, in my ass today in the hopes of clearing it up before it gets worse. I still have the scar on my arm from last year or the year before when it got bad. I get this crap at least once a year. (Oh, and also thank you very much, when I went to the doc this morning I've lost like 15-20 pounds compared to when I got on the scales at my mom's a few months ago.)

The reading for Donut's wedding has been written. I wrote two different things and she took that and blended it with some of her own stuff. I hope I can get through it without crying, but I seriously doubt it. I'm all set though, we've got a hotel room that night and after the wedding and The Boy dances with her they're heading to my folks house (cos my Bro and SIL are going to be out of town) and we get to hang out and have fun. Whoooohooooo : )

Erternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

OK, we just finished watching this (I can barely type) movie, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and let me tell you, it is fucked up.

I think it's a movie I'll have to watch again. The premise is that this couple has each other erased from their memories. How could you do that? How could you erase someone from your memory? Even bad things or bad people or bad times, everything that went before goes into making you who you are.

And, if you knew that person for decades they would touch so much of your life if you went to erase the memories of them that were tied to all these other things you'd be erasing so much of your life.

But, if you were truly meant to be with someone and you were erased once then aren't you destined to meet them again? Still, you'd be missing out on so many good things.

Very very strange movie.

Weekend of nothing

OK, now that I've purged myself with the Coming Clean blog it's time to start the weekend.

It's Saturday noonish and I'm on my first cup of coffee since I just got up about 30 minutes ago. I freakin' love sleeping in late. I love it. I think that was probably the hardest part about having kids for me---getting up early when they were young. Getting up in the middle of the night, no problem. Getting up and staying up at 6 am when they're 1-3 years old and are wide awake happy and ready to start their day at the butt crack of dawn, tough times.

So this morning I was lying there in that half dreaming half awake state just reveling in it when The Boy comes in---The Girl took my blanket. There was a blanket fight. She did this he did that, never mind, Mom's up now. Coffee and computer and I'm OK.

We have no where to be this weekend, no time table. The Girl's sleep over fell through so no extra kids or people : ) We're going to work in the yard, putter around the house and hopefully just relax and be a family this weekend.

I could slip into a little pity party of parenting here because The Girl is growing up. Seriously, she's going to need a bra. She's blossoming and it happened overnight. She's my baby, the one I waited five long years for and now she actually needs a bra. This time next year she'll be finishing fifth grade and getting ready for middle school. WTF? How did this happen? I was bringing her home from the hospital yesterday. Hearing her say pickameyup just the other day. Finding her in the bathroom with permanent black marker all over her legs just the other day; watching her throw her pacy in the trash on her third birthday; hearing her say she and brother were good dancers when he was only six months old lying on his back. OK, I'm getting verklempt--kids shouldn't be allowed to grow up. It's so bittersweet.

Coming clean

I think sometimes, since I use this blog to vent, that The Hubs gets a bad rap or rather you just see one side of the story. Granted over the last 4 years or so I have not been nearly as bad as I was starting out. Looking back at the things I said and did in the beginning of our relationship I'm sometimes amazed he's still around. I was (and still can be from time to time) a bitch. I know right, you can't even imagine that I could be a bitch huh? : )

For example. Before we were married I had moved out to live with him in OK. I of course should get props for this because we hadn't seen each other for a year or better, he called me on the phone said we needed to either make it work or not, he drove here, got me and I moved there. It was an adventure. : )

Anyway, after I was there for maybe a month he was out of town for a night or two. I was waiting tables and ended up going out to a club with a coworker (female). She had a friend there who had a friend so there was drinking, dancing and flirting. This was Oklahoma folks, cowboys and two-stepping. When we left the club there was talk about going back to their place to keep partying and I did follow them into the apartment complex, thought better of it and turned around and went home.

I lied about pretty much all of this to The Hubs (who was not The Hubs but the Sig Other at that time). I said I didn't dance with anyone, then I said I did, but just fast danced, I didn't flirt, etc. It became pretty obvious to him I'd lied the next time we went to that club and one of the guys kept trying to get my attention.

And this is just one of the examples of the times I fucked up and lied about it; when there's been alcohol involved and I crossed the line. Granted I've not done this type of thing since then, but I've not always been the most honest person, hence one of his concerns about me being out of town (or in town and not with him) and drinking. Of course the other concern is my lack of control when it comes to alcohol and the things that could (and have) happened to me when I get to that point.

There's a reason for everything. I'm not the helpless victim of an overbearing husband. I'm someone who's done a lot of questionable, dishonest, dangerous things who's been fortunate to have someone that cares enough to keep pulling me back from the fire even though I fight them kicking and screaming all the way.

all you need is love

tonight i finally put my thoughts and ideas on paper for the reading for my friend donut's wedding. this was a much more difficult task than i imagined. i was excited at first and poured through books looking for the right words. i don't know if i found them but here are some things i did find. these aren't necessarily in the reading but they're moving just the same.

love one another, but make not a bond of love:
let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be
alone,
even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same
music.
give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
for only the hand of life can contain your hearts.
and stand together yet not too near together:
for the pillars of the temple stand apart,
and the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.---kahlil
gibran

Love's Philosophy
Percy Bysshe Shelley
the fountains mingle with the river,
and the rivers with the ocean;
the winds of heaven mix forever,
with a sweet emotion;
nothing in the world is single;
all things by a law divine
in one another's being mingle:---
why not i with thine?

see! the mountains kiss high heaven,
and the waves clasp one another;
no sister flower would be forgiven
if it disdained its brother;
and the sunlight clasps the earth,
and the moonbeams kiss the sea:---
what are all these kissings worth,
if thou kiss not me?

Sonnets from the Portuguese XIV
Elizabeth Barrett Browning
if thou must love me, let it be for naught
except for love's sake only. do not say
"i love her for her smile...her look...her way
of speaking gently,--for a trick of thought
that falls in well with mine, and certes brought
a sense of pleasant ease on such a day."

for these things in themselves, beloved, may
be changed, or change for thee,---and love so
wrought,
may be unwrought so. neither love me for
thine own dear pity's wiping my cheeks dry,---
a creature might forget to weep, who bore
thy comfort long, and lose thy love thereby.
but love me for love's sake, that evermore
thou mayst love on, through love's eternity.

On Love - Thomas à Kempis
Love is a mighty power, a great and complete good.
Love alone lightens every burden, and makes rough places smooth.
It bears every hardship as though it were nothing, and renders all bitterness sweet and acceptable.
Nothing is sweeter than love,
Nothing stronger,
Nothing higher,
Nothing wider,
Nothing more pleasant,
Nothing fuller or better in heaven or earth; for love is born of God.
Love flies, runs and leaps for joy.
It is free and unrestrained.
Love knows no limits, but ardently transcends all bounds.
Love feels no burden, takes no account of toil,
attempts things beyond its strength.
Love sees nothing as impossible,
for it feels able to achieve all things.
It is strange and effective,
while those who lack love faint and fail.
Love is not fickle and sentimental,
nor is it intent on vanities.
Like a living flame and a burning torch,
it surges upward and surely surmounts every obstacle.

Excerpt from The Bridge Across Forever - Richard Bach
A soul mate
is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we
feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be
completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for
who we're pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter
what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we're safe in our own
paradise. Our soul mate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of
direction. When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances
are we've found the right person. Our soul mate is the one who makes life come
to life.

TMI

Before you read any further I warn you this is probably TMI. I'm halfway writing this because The Hubs doesn't think I will and halfway writing this because the initial purpose of this blog was for me to use it as a journal and write my uncensored thoughts. Knowing my readers as I do I often censor myself (I know, you're thinking really? cos some of this stuff is pretty personal) but I'm going to try to stop doing that.

So, the title of this blog is Cool Fuck Faces.

We're in the middle of West Wing and pause for a smoke. I ask The Hubs, "Do you keep your eyes open when we're having sex?" (Obviously I don't or I'd know the answer to this question.)
He said, "No because I like watching you. You make cool fuck faces."

(Now he's freaking out Special K aka Keely with the flashlight.)

I think this goes back to a premise I have that men are more visually stimulated than women.

However, he doesn't keep his eyes open when we're kissing.

I also sometimes close my eyes when I'm dancing and singing.

Tatts

Saturday night while the girls were working on their crafts at camp the adults were talking about this and that. I'll set the scene. We have the 40-50 something mom w/ five daughters, the 40-50 something mom (who's part German) with four kids (two daughters in the troop) daughters and working on her third marriage, the 50+ grandpa from our church who's married to one of the biggest busy-body bitches in the world and my new friend who's probably a little younger than me. My new friend and I were sitting closest to each other being snarky about the cadets when I overheard the others talking about piercings and tattoos. : )

So I'm sitting there smiling inside as they talk about tatts. The German mom was saying she didn't understand why people got tattoos. There are perfectly good temporary ones so why would you get one? They were going back and forth about it and I said I thought tattoos were interesting and made a personal statement. The German mom said aha, you're one of THOSE girls, you have a tattoo don't you? Let me see it.

I'm sure I blushed, I mean the grandpa from our church is sitting right there. I said, uh, no, I can't show mine but I have one. Right then The Girl walks up and says, yeah, Mommy has a tattoo on her butt and Daddy has one on his arm. Now the other parents, except for my snarky friend, think I'm one of THOSE girls : ) LOL

Speaking of tatts--nobody weighed in on the ankle tattoo idea. I don't know if I'll really do it, but I'm curious to hear your opinions.

Life lessons

I'm always fascinated to learn about other people's relationships. Today one of my friends told me she and her husband had their first fight this weekend. They're first fight in 8 years. WTF? How can you be married to someone or be with someone for 8 years and not fight? She said she doesn't like confrontation so when there is an issue she usually doesn't say anything. Her husband basically gets his way all the time. He makes major purchases without her input, makes all the major financial decisions without her input and I can't fathom any of that.

I find this odd. Very odd. I'm not saying it's healthy to fight all the time but I also don't think it's healthy not to fight. Not fighting means you don't care enough to express your opinions or don't feel comfortable enough with the other person to speak your mind. There has to be some lack of trust there if you can't express how you feel. Not rocking the boat doesn't mean everything is ok.

I also don't understand people who say if you love someone you don't get jealous. Yes, there are extremes, which also stem from lack of trust. But if there isn't even the hint of jealousy, even if in jest or not, there is a lack of caring. Complacency means you don't care enough to voice your opinions or concerns or love. I don't understand that.

This weekend, talking with the other moms at camp I learned about their relationships. One, who's on her third marriage, basically said she knows her husband cheats and she looks the other way. Another said even if she tries to make her husband jealous he doesn't react. Again, I don't understand this.

To me it's all about complacency. People who are so laid back that nothing bothers them, they don't argue, they don't express any displeasure, don't get jealous and don't fight means they don't really care enough either.

One mother this weekend really amazed me. She's probably in her late 40s or early 50s and has 5 daughters from 20 something to 10 years old. She's on her second marriage to a younger man and wants to have a child with him. Wow. Five kids and this late in life she wants another baby. I asked her why. She said her husband doesn't have children of his own and they want to share that experience. She said it makes all the difference in the world when you find your soul mate.

So, when I came home yesterday and the house was clean, The Boy was in one piece, dinner had been planned and The Hubs was happy to see me I realized that I really do have it better than a lot of people--even if he hasn't gotten the hint that I don't really like necklaces and prefer silver to gold : )

I think most everyone is guilty at some point of taking their significant other for granted. After awhile you see the bad points more than the good points and you think everyone else has it better than you do. But if you listen to other people's situations you begin to realize that you really are lucky. Of course nobody is perfect and you're still going to argue, but in the big scheme of things the gold necklace doesn't matter it's the fact that one person knows you, knows the real you and fits with you like no other. It really is about soul mates.

A Camping We Will Go

It's Sunday afternoon and we survived the camping trip. I meant to journal this weekend so I could share with you every detail : ), but I didn't. Instead I'll just give a rundown.

Friday we were to leave, as a group, for the campground by 5:30. Girls were late, leader unorganized so it was more like after 6. Then, the girl that was riding with us didn't bring her bag lunch so I had to stop on the way to get her something, which meant we lost the rest of the caravan. I had directions from the leader but of course got lost, way lost. I called her once, she was no help. Called The Hubs at home and he wasn't having it much better. He and The Boy were locked out of the house. A little later I found my way back to where I needed to be, called The Hubs, he'd gotten in the house (thankfully I'd not locked the kitchen window: ) ). However this made me nervous about the rest of the weekend. It didn't help matters that I was transporting one of the two girls in the troop that is medicated for her behavior. : ) Yes, a fun ride.

So, we eventually get to the camp, hike in, carrying some of our stuff, to get our gear stowed in our platform tents. No biggie, I spent the summer in one in Texas in the heat with armadillos and spiders as a camp counselor. I quickly made friends with one of the other moms in our troop. I'd met her before but she doesn't attend meetings so this weekend in the trenches with her was pretty fun. She runs her mouth and has a thought process similar to mine : )

Friday night we made smores and they retired a flag---I'd never seen this done. This is where they have a ceremony and burn flags that are worn out, etc. I'm sure had the cadet troop (our troop leader's other troop--w/ her daughter---that joined us this weekend.) been better this would have been a more impressive ceremony, but it wasn't. My new friend and I ended up passing out marshmallows and being snarky about the leader and her cadet troop : ) I was struck by two things at this point. Kids are not polite. They do not say thank you or please or anything. Also, the Brownies that were there we so much nicer and sweeter than the older girls.

Girl Scouts have capers or chores when they camp and our patrols chore the first night was cleaning the bathrooms. You want this job first because basically you're just sweeping out the cobwebs and wiping things down since they've not been used since the last campers were there (who cleaned it before they left). Our girls shrieked and screamed at every spider, moth or bug. It was interesting and I did a lot of spider stomping. Then to bed. The Girl ended up getting into it with one of her bunk mates (the hyper girl that rode w/ us) and ended up in my tent on the floor. By this point I'd not had a smoke since we arrived and it was midnight. I know it's camp, you don't smoke, I didn't want to smoke around the girls, so after most of them were in bed I stepped off a little in the woods to smoke. Ah, sweet relief right? Nope, the effing leader (who I've begun to hate over the weekend) told me technically we can only smoke in the fire rings. I was like, yeah, I figured that but I didn't want to smoke in front of the girls. Beeotch.

The Girl is growing up though. My motherly attention was not appreciated--don't hug me, don't kiss me don't mother me in front of the girls. Sniff sniff. Not the best thing to be confronted with on Mother's Day weekend, but I noticed the other girls were doing the same thing so it wasn't just me.

Saturday we got up to start our activities at some Godforsaken hour, like 6 a.m. or something. It was crazy, who the hell WANTS to get up that early? Insane. Thankfully one of the girl's grandfather (we know them from church) went with us and he had coffee ready each morning. I also discovered he smokes too and so we he'd sneak off to smoke I'd join him since the leader wasn't about to tell him to smoke in the fire ring. Beeotch.

Off to archery. I should say that everything is not right beside each other at camp. I don't know if you've ever been to a girl scout camp, but that shit is spread out. Gravel roads, trails, nature and you hike from one place to the next. So we went to archery. The girls did great! Lots of fun and The Girl hit the target lots of times AND got a bulls eye : ) After archery off to the lake for water fun. They kayaked and canoed and I was so proud. The Girl got in the kayak and took off like she'd been doing it forever. She's never been in one. I was scared at first because it's her, in the water, in a boat alone; but she was great. They let the moms try it too.

First my new found friend and I tried the canoe. I'd been in one before, camping with my grandparents, but never really rowed one. It's more difficult than it looks, getting in sync etc. After that we tried the kayaks and I loved it. It is so incredibly cool. You're in total control of your movements, it flows easily, even for me, and it was just great fun. Out on the water in your own boat going as fast or slow, wherever and you are powering your movement. I really, really enjoyed that part.

The morning was a hit and made better by the fact the leader was not with us and was with her cadets : )

Back to the camp for lunch and a little break before the next activity. (Oh, so you get the full extent of this weekend, what, as a woman would make this even MORE fun you may wonder? How about starting your period Friday morning so your worst days of your cycle are spent in the woods with little kids in tents : ) )

Afternoon activities were to include a challenge course and rock climbing wall. After the challenge course that wasn't a challenge course it opened up and stormed, buckets of rain all over the place. Thankfully we were prepared with our ponchos : ) We did end up hanging out at the dining hall during the worst of the storm before going back to camp. Rock climbing was cancelled and we couldn't build a campfire that night because of the rain. The counselors that ran the challenge course cheated the girls out of most of it by wasting time on basic games. When my friend said something about it the counselor, a teenager/girl scout, got hateful. What the hell is up with girl scouts these days?

Thankfully all was not lost because though we were in tents we had a shelter/kitchen area and some propane stoves so we still ate dinner and had a good time. Then the girls decorated socks and made Mother's Day flower pots and we went to a sock hop at the dining hall. After that it was back to camp, get ready for bed and lights out. It rained during the night, very peaceful to sleep in a tent in the rain. I slept like a log both nights.

Up early again this morning, clean up, pack up, load up and a flag ceremony then home.

The worst part of the trip really was the cadet troop. These are about 8 girls in middle school who lacked any respect for adults, the leader or the juniors in our troop. They were obnoxious, rude, condescending and bitches. The leader/mom had one set of rules for them and another for our girls. The Girl will not be in this troop again next year even if my new friend and I have to lead our own troop.

We got home around 1. Though I showered yesterday morning I was so looking forward to a nice hot shower in my own bathroom. It was heavenly. Shower, some adult time with The Hubs, a nap and now he's grilling me ribs and making dinner for Mother's Day.

What a great weekend! Made better also by the fact The Hubs and The Boy did my daughterly duty of celebrating Mother's Day w/ my Mom : ) The Bro and SIL had everyone over to their house yesterday for Mother's Day and (sniff sniff) I missed it : )

My stars

Crazy busy week that's not yet done. The Hubs was out of town part of the week, we had both Boy and Girl scout meetings, last night was the first grade spring musical and The Girl and I leave for our GS weekend camping trip today : ) No rest for the weary. (And no computer access all weekend! Whatever will I do? No blogging, no email no BookWorm--the new game Big T turned me on too : ) )

The Girl played the recorder last night at the concert and as much as that thing drives me up a freakin' wall when she plays it around the house, she did an awesome job last night. I hope she keeps up with music because I really think she'll be good at it.

The Boy was in all his glory last night. The musical was really cute. The premise is it's in a barnyard and all of the animals, pigs, ducks, chickens, etc. are trying to get the cow to moo. The Boy and a handful of other boys were pigs--they sang a song called Ham it Up. Could NOT have been more appropriate for The Boy. He had a small speaking part and then they all sang and then he busted out some crazy dance moves. He is a HAM for sure. A natural. He's certainly not shy.

Yesterday when I picked them up The Girl told me she got into it again with the Bitch kid I've mentioned before. I think this little girl must be possessed. She is all friendly with The Girl for a few weeks and then she turns into an absolute Bitch. Yes, I know, she's a kid but I want to smack her. The Girl gets upset and of course that makes me want to beat the other girl even more. Do I talk to her mom? I can't threaten the kid but dammit I'm tired of her crap. The Girl doesn't stand up for herself enough and I'm sure I'm only getting half the story and I'm not one of those parents who thinks my kids are perfect or blameless, but this other girl is awful. The Hubs said they'll probably do this throughout high school. God I hope not.

The smile you smile

These are lyrics to another great Van song, The Smile You Smile

The smile you smile is you
And I see through your laughing eyes
The smile you smile is you
And I see through your laughing eyes
And in the whirlpool of them
I can be in paradise
An I'd go roamin' in the gloamin'
And ever and a day with you
And I'd go roamin' in the gloamin'
And ever and a day with you
An' sit between the stars and say
Look, that's my point of view
I yi-yi, yi-yi, I love you
(I love you)
I yi-yi, yi-yi, I love you
(I love you)
And talk to trees and sunshine
Feel your lips against my lip
And talk to trees and sunshine
Feel your lips against my lip
And smell your sweet perfume
And even touch your fingertip
I yi-yi-yi, I love you
(I love you)
I yi-yi, I love, love you
(I love you)

You really have to hear the music to get the full effect, it's perfect.

Weekend update

Yesterday my Mom and sister and kids came over. It was fine, relatively (pun intended) painless. It's weird because when it was just us with them the conversation was stilted, not that flowing. I guess because I'm not going to ask too many questions that would involve them in conversation because I really don't care. Then we met my SIL, Bro and nephew at the spring carnival. That was better. I really enjoy hanging out with them. My Bro is as much of a smart ass as I am and my SIL often (unknowingly I think) plays the straight man in his comedic efforts. We hadn't hung out with them for awhile; we all get wrapped up in what we're doing and go a few weeks without connecting, but I'm always glad when we do. They came back to the house afterwards for gumbo (YUM) and it was nice.

It's gorgeous outside today, even if a bit windy. Windows open, fresh air, a little afternoon delight : ) thank you very much please may I have another, and we'll go see Spiderman 3 later today. There's something to be said for trysts in the middle of a Sunday afternoon.

Alanis Morissette lyrics that (mostly) apply to me

I hate the world today
You're so good to me
I know that I can't change
I tried to tell you but you look at me like maybe I'm an angel underneath; innocent and sweet
Yesterday I cried;
Must've been relief to see the softer side
I can understand how you'd be so confused
I don't envy you;
I'm a little bit of everything
all rolled into one
I'm a Bitch I'm a Lover
I'm a child I'm a Mother
I'm a sinner I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between you know you wouldn't want it any other way
So take me as I am
This might mean you'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that when I start to make you nervous
I'm going to extremes;
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing
Just when you think, you got me figured out
The season's already changin'
I think it's cool; you do what you do
And don't try to save me
I'm a bitch, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess of my knees
When you hurt; when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I'm enough; I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way

Pluto and the Break Up

Tonight I learned that NASA has sent an explorer spaceship to Pluto and that we will see first live pictures of the planet in 2015. That's pretty exciting. I had no idea. Apparently earlier this year the craft sent back images of Jupiter. Isn't that just amazing? I mean really, it takes years to get to a planet, years and then this craft will send us pictures of it. Simply incredible. And, there really is another planet, Xena. I'm beginning to think I've been in a cave or something for years. I knew there was talk of a planet X but didn't know much else about it. Van Morrison and a planet I've discovered this year. Wow.

We just watched The Break Up with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Anniston (and Mr. Vincent DiNofrio thank you). I hated the ending, sucked, movies should not end that way (but then Denys Finch Hatten died at the end of Out of Africa, also wrong, but I love that movie). The movie was like watching a mirror image of The Hubs and I. Not the story line at all, but the way they argued. She went from lemons to flowers to you don't care about me in a heart beat and I followed her train of thought but then could also see and understand the complete surprise and bewilderment that he experienced. Like WTF is she talking about? So for that I liked the movie cos I thought we were the only people who argued like that. Obviously these were actors but someone had to have that type of experience to write the script.

Tatt and stuff

What do you think of a small tatt on the ankle? Too showy? I don't know. On the bar to the right I have a link to a tatt I'd get if I ever got a second one. I like my tatt but of course don't get to see it often since it's on my ass, which sucks.

I should be doing something productive like laundry or cleaning the bathrooms but it's rainy and chilly outside and I'd rather just put on pajamas and veg. Why is it that you work all week and then on the weekends typically you spend most of the time cleaning or grocery shopping or something? That's just wrong. I'd love to have one weekend where we did nothing chore related.

So I just got off the phone with my Mom. She and my sister (and her kids) are coming over tomorrow for dinner and we're meeting my SIL and Bro and nephew at our local spring carnival--that is if the 60% chance of rain holds off. I don't think I've talked to my Mom in about a month. Is that bad? She had to tell me that my sister is having a colonoscopy next week (I knew this from the call from the sis before) and how my sister thinks she's dying. Ya know, I don't even want to get into that. She's always dying or has something severe or whatever. Her bi-polar is so much worse than mine : ) I've never checked into a treatment place for mine at least--she has repeatedly. Ok, enough on that it's bringing me down. Hard enough to think about them being here tomorrow but I feel like I have to make an effort once in awhile, plus I do like my niece and nephew. Ok, I like my nephew. I love my niece but she is such a whiner and so clingy--not her fault considering all the crap that went on for most of her six years.

My dear sweet friend Donut suggested I might have age spots. Bitch : ) She better be nice to me, I still haven't written my thing for her wedding (which I plan to do this weekend).

Today co-workers were talking about different TV shows and sadly I knew of none of them. Why you may ask? Uh, because we watch West Wing every night (just about) after the kids go to bed. I was CSI (Vegas not the others) and like other shows, but I don't follow any other shows. We're in season 4 for the third time : ) I still laugh, cry and am surprised by the West Wing.

I suck at headlines

The hardest part of writing this thing for me is the headline. I feel pressured to come up with something catchy, entertaining and witty. I typically fall flat on that. You'd think, given my job, I could do this, alas, I suck at it at work too.

So, it's been a while since I posted and been awhile since I've done it during the day. I'm getting back to good this week so this will probably be a bunch of random thoughts.

First, last night I realized The Hubs is a better wife than I am. He's a better gardener and cook than I could ever be; though I do mow and weed eat better than he does and I make good chili. That's pretty much the only dish I do well. I can cook other things, but not well. BTW, the yard is looking kick ass. So far we (I mean he) has planted four rose bushes, two rose trees, creeping phlox, two hydrangeas and 3-4 hibiscus.

The Boy is on cloud nine because Spiderman 3 opens this weekend. He saved up his allowance and bought the new black Spiderman suit. Now he has the two ratty red ones and that one. He puts them on hangers and hangs them on his wall. He's been watching the first two movies for the last two weeks over and over again. Just about every day when we come home he puts on one of the suits. I hope he gets out of that before he's 16 : )

I was pleasantly pleased this week. I bought a skirt a size smaller than I usually wear. I don't do scales so don't know if I've actually lost weight or if it's just repositioned itself.

Musically I've been back on a Train kick, though today I should be listening to Rod since he's in concert tonight. I hope he doesn't die before I get to see him again. Van still lives in my soul though and I have to listen to it mixed with Train.

I've decided that if I had to either be blind or deaf I'd have to be blind. I couldn't live without sound. What about you?

"I don't spend my time with anyone who doesn't think I'm wonderful or somewhat cash refundable at times." ----Train lyric/thought for the day