and so it begins

....the end of childhood. i've been trying to prepare myself for this year for a long time. the year my daughter graduates middle school and my baby boy graduates elementary school. it will happen in june but we're already starting down the slippery slope of them gaining more independence and becoming teenagers.

well, technically the girl is the one spreading her wings right now, but it will just snowball and then they'll both be going off to college and leaving me.

last weekend the girl went to a boy/girl party. at a boy's house. i knew half of dozen of her friends who were going. girls. turns out there were like 10 girls there and the one boy. don't you find that odd? i do. she had a blast. watched scary movies (which she never does at home).

tonight she is going to a carnival/fair type of thing in our town. her and two friends. w/out parents. for the first time. i am .....scared, sad, nervous. i don't worry about her and her behavior or actions....yet. i worry about all the crazy fuckers in the world. i know she has a good head on her shoulders. but she's growing up. she wants to go out and do things w/ her friends. i will slowly lose my influence on her. i will have to trust that the hubs and i have done our jobs to prepare her. teach her. good lord this part of parenting is hard. i read this quote the other day about motherhood:

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone

i think the older my kids get the truer this statement becomes. i know i will be a blubbering idiot they day of their graduations. and yes, i know they are still children, partly, and this is nothing compared to high school graduation and college and omg....weddings. if i think about it too much i don't think i'd be able to stop crying.

so.....love up your kids folks....even when they're being annoying pains in the ass. because you're going to turn around one day and they'll be off on their own living their life. SOB!