expectations--fail

this has been one of the most nerve racking, hair pulling weekends we've had in a long, long time. the faux baby the girl brought home for her life-skills class has been unbelievably hard. i honestly think the thing is broken. the girl has been stressed out, really stressed out. we've all lost sleep and are exhausted for the most part. it has inspired conversations though.

the girl has gotten so upset when she can't find the right key to meet the baby's needs. she's cried. she gets frustrated. she said it makes her feel like a failure. i explained that sometimes real parents feel that way too. having a baby is a hard job, but when it is your own it is worth it. you love it, you care for it, it's much different than a doll. she thanked me for getting up w/ it in the middle of the night.

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my parents. i don't even know where to start w/ this round of craziness. the hubs talked to my dad and explained why we wouldn't be partaking in their camper-fun-fest this summer. the hubs said my dad seemed to understand and said he'd explain it to my mom. the very next day my mom went home sick from work and cancelled our shopping on saturday. (she'd guilted me in to going shopping w/ her to pick out accessories for her new living room.) that same afternoon my dad drunk dialed my brother's house in the afternoon, knowing full well my brother was at work. i suppose he expected to reach my sil and instead he reached her mom, who was babysitting. did he politely leave a message? hell no. he talked my sil's mother's ear off about how my mom was home sick, it was probably stress related and she was upset and how if my bro/sil also weren't partaking in the camper-fun-fest they'd need to let my mom down easy because she was so upset. REALLY?

saturday i tried to call my mom, who was asleep each time i called. when i did finally reach her she said nothing about the "stress" or being upset but that she'd gone to the doctor that morning and they were going to do blood work tomorrow. my parents are so fucked up i don't even know what to think any more. today the hubs helped move some furniture for them, because he said he would before all of this stress/mess happened. he tried to get my mom to come clean and be honest about being upset, but of course she didn't. later she sent an email thanking him and telling him she was not upset w/ him/us for not going camping and of course she understood.

at this point i don't even know what the truth is with this whole situation, all i know is my dad shouldn't pick up the phone when he's drinking, my mom shouldn't build castles in the sky and then get stressed out when they come crumbling down and if she is using her health as a guilt tactic she needs to knock it the hell off.

i feel as if i'm coming to the point where i need to have a talk w/ her. so many times over the years the hubs has run interference for me, not because i've asked him to but because he'd rather be the bad guy than have me confront them and be the bad guy. i just don't know that i can keep quiet any longer. i just need everything out on the table because each time they pull this stupid shit like they did this weekend i feel worse and worse about them.

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platinum weddings. oh my holy hell. talk about expectation fail. we've been numbly watching these episodes for the last hour or two and it is insane. i keep thinking of all the girls growing up these days, girls watching these shows and thinking this is the norm. this is what weddings should be like. where in the hell do these people get their money? and why, oh why do they waste all of that money on ONE day of their lives? is it because i've been married so long that i am no longer wowed by the pomp and ceremony of a wedding? that i think spending a quarter of a million dollars on ONE day of your life is beyond ridiculous?