tomorrow at the ass crack of morning (6:30) the girl and i and half of the sixth graders in her school are piling on a bus for a lovely drive to alabama. we are going to space camp in huntsville : ) (i'll think of you hotch, though i'm sure i have no idea how close you live to huntsville). we will try not to disturb too much of the space program while we are there. i am trying to convince the hubs to possibly do a guest post or two while i'm away. i'll be gone wed-friday.
i am still floundering a bit with this unemployment thing. i have not figured out a good balance of my time yet. there are many things i need to do (aside, of course, from finding a J.O.B.) and things that i want to do and in the mean time i'm fighting the feeling of just not wanting to do anything.
i'm sure a lot more of these feelings will unfold here. i feel like i'm on the brink of something; almost like i've been given a gift, a do-over if you will. i know i have to have a job (with insurance) but part of me also wants to see what this is like, this stay at home mom stuff. right now things haven't changed, but in a couple of weeks the kids will be coming home after school. and then there will be the summer.
in a perfect world i'd get an awesome full time/full benefits job next week, but that's not happening. i also know that the grass is always greener on the other side. the part of me that wonders what it would be like to have the kids home w/ me is getting bonked over the head by the part of me that knows they will quickly get bored and frustrated being home all the time and i will have to find things to entertain them and we will all get on each others' nerves. i know this as sure as i'm sitting here.
the part of me that feels like i got a do-over says that because i was so burnt out w/ my job. i liked aspects of it but i had totally lost my passion for it. the corporate environment sucked the fucking life out of me. maybe i'm being idealistic in thinking that there is a job out there, a company, that would be a perfect fit for me. i also know that when all is said and done i will find a job and even if it is not the perfect job it will be a job.
in the meantime i will try to look at all of this as a learning experience.
i have learned three things this week. three totally random things actually. first, when the grocery store has a big chunk of beef on sale, those chunks that i would have no idea how to cook? yeah, you just have the meat guy grind that shit up and you have sirloin hamburger meat. voila. i never knew.
also--when you're cooking/prepping stuff in the kitchen, put all of your scraps in a bowl rather than keep going back and forth to the garbage can. i'm sure you all knew that already but i didn't and it was a pretty aha moment. like, why the hell didn't i think of that before.
lastly--cats like sitting on the laptop keyboard. blo (before lay off) i would noodle around on the laptop and then close it up and stick it in the dining room or something. now i tend to leave it on the kitchen table, open, so i can check email (because i have become inordinately accustomed to being "plugged" in and can't go too long w/ out checking email or whatever--yes, i'm a loser) and meow has decided this is a lovely warm spot to sit. not so good when i come back and her fat ass has depressed a lot of buttons and i have all these windows open and my screen size gets shrunk and i don't know how to fix it. nice.
bea--i will mail your box o' goodies on saturday or monday (since i'm going to be spaced out until then). don't worry, just because it was a bizarro sex contest does not mean i will send you porn or bizarro sex stuff. uh....unless that's what you want? i think we have some flavored condoms around here somewhere ; )