Wednesday, March 31, 2010


the title is blank because...well, because i can't think of a good title. i have a really great post i need to write, but this isn't it. the great, positive, shiny happy post to come is about the girl and i taking a mother/daughter trip for a few days last week and how great it was.

several things prevented me from coming home and immediately dripping w/ happiness all over a blog post about it. i am in pain. physical pain. i do not know what in fuck i have done to my shoulder/back but i am in constant pain. it certainly didn't come from exercising. well, if i raise my hand over my head a certain way it doesn't hurt. if i put heat or pressure on it, it doesn't hurt. if i hold it a certain way and stick out my tongue and cross my eyes it doesn't hurt, well, sometimes, but sometimes i can do exactly that and it hurts anyway. i can still move it all around, rotate it, use it, etc. but otherwise, yeah, it fucking hurts.

after our splendiferous mother/daughter time the girl had a bit of a friend drama thing that led to her lying to me. when i confronted her about it she said she couldn't talk to me because when she does i try to make her see i understand by telling her a story from when i was her age. she said she could talk to the hubs because he's straight forward. nothing like feeling like you just got stabbed in the back after an awesome bonding time. s'ok. i'll get over it.

also? yeah, w/ the parent drama my mom tried to circumnavigate the whole fucking issue, sweep it under the rug like she's always done, by inviting the kids and i to lunch this week. i said nope, not until we resolve this. so far i still haven't heard from her.

i had a telephone interview today for some possible freelance work. omfg. it was horrible. it's my fault, i got cocky. i had already sent in my resume, writing samples, and had emailed w/ the woman prior. the interview today was not w/ her but someone else w/ the company, a guy i knew in my former two jobs. i felt the interview was sort of....i don't know...for show? because he knows me, knows my work, knew me at both previous jobs and knows i know how to do the writing they need me to do. he basically asked me what i'm doing now (uh, looking for work ass hat), what my hourly rate is, how i'd feel about the project (uh, i've been out of work for a year, i'd feel good about any project right about now) and then said it would be a few weeks before they made a decision. for fucking real????? omg. and when i say i got cocky, it was in my head that i did so. i thought this "interview" was just a formality and that i'd have a freelance gig in hand. and? the dude was trying desperately to be funny and asked me some sports-related question. something like, oh, and the most important question is--who are you rooting for in the final four? ummmm, dude, i don't do sports. i know i live in nc and that means i am supposed to be foaming at the mouth over this march madness crap, but really? i could not care less. of course i didn't say that. after telling him i don't watch sports he then asked me if i knew so and so--some big football guy from pittsburgh. hmmm, nope.

and i've been thinking that i bitch a lot here. there aren't a lot of happy happy joy posts lately. then i remembered that i started this for me. i was lucky enough to "meet" some great people who also blog, people i've come to feel connected to. and i figure if you're still reading, you get it. you realize that while i may lean toward the crazy side and that right now things are sucking big green donkey balls, at some point i will write something more entertaining or uplifting or positive.

while i am writing what might be the blogosphere's longest bitch, wtf is going on w/ LOST? for those of you who watch that is. omfg. there are 6 episodes left and i swear to the easter bunny that i have no more understanding of what's going on today than i did when i started watching this damn thing.

also on my tv radar are discovery's life series---the photography and filming on this are astounding but frankly i think the writing sucks balls. also, in plain sight on usa, starts back tonight. love that show. probably because the lead actor came from west wing and west wing characters show up on there from time to time, plus, i just like the story.

i will have pics to share soon. things are blooming, spring has sprung, and i will get out of this fucking funk.


cheatymoon said...

At least I am in excellent company with the funk.

Hope the back feels better soon. Bad backs are no fun at all.

Good luck w/ the job...

And we don't need a shiny happy post to keep reading. xo

Penny said...

I hope you are feeling better. I have absoutely no parenting advice. I can't seem to get through the morning routine with out wanting to give my son to some gypsies.

My mom is also an avoider and it makes me CRAZY. I think she actually is so nuts that she rewrites history in her mind and you can't talk to her about anything because she will SWEAR it didn't happen. UGH.

drollgirl said...

oh girl. you are going through it right now! i hope you can fix that back problemo PRONTO! miserable! i have a pinched something or other in my back, and it is annoying as hell! hate it!

hope you and the girl patch things up. i know you will. you probably already have!

and your parents! argh. why don't they get it?!??! cripes.

hang in there. things will get better. and you might have done better on that phone interview than you think!!!

Surely said...

Great, now you have me singing "It's my blog & I can cry if I want to" LOL

I've been feeling grouchy too. My BFF C calls it the Irish Depression.
So, please come join the party. The water's warm.

Oh, preteens. You poor dear. I got nothing to least no healthy suggestions.

I think the universe is telling you that you need a career change. Yeah, easy for me to say huh?

Hope things are looking up.

Hotch Potchery said...

Man, I thought that I commented on this eons ago. Sorry about "the lie". I always feel so betrayed when that stuff happens, but I realize (most of the time, WAY later) that kids are dumb and don't do it to you, they just make bad decisions.

Kristin.... said...

Can I just say "oy vey" and that can cover it all? :)

Gal Friday said...

How's the your back/shoulder now? And the mother/daughter thing now(I feel so down and hurt when I am shunted aside by my daughter these days)
Hope you've gotten out of your funk just a little by now..gardening's good for keeping your mind healthy, I find(I love weeding--it's SO satisfying!)

Just B said...

Hang in there! Do you feel relief with your parents? I think it is very brave.

Astarte said...

Good for you for standing up to your mother. You already went through the stress of having the showdown happen, you might as well stick with it, right?

I loved the Life show, but did they really have to show animals humping in EVERY SINGLE WAY?! Every time a new animal came on screen, we learned what it eats, where it lives, and what position it prefers. I watched it with the kids, and OMG! Seriously!