Tuesday, October 28, 2008

tuesday conversations

today i took cupcakes to the boy's class and ate lunch w/ him. cafeteria food really does suck balls. there is something to be said though for hanging out w/ about 20 people who are at least a foot shorter than you. i felt so tall.

when i got to the cafeteria the boy was already sitting at the table. it was the GIRL table. he was the only boy sitting there. i asked him about it.

his answer? cos i'm the only one brave enough to sit with the girls.

and now for some random snippets of convos from today:
the boy: we had an election in our class today. we were all registrated to vote. i voted for mccain. he won; it was 19 to three. i think the three people who voted for obama just did it because their parents told them to.

me: oh really? and why did you vote for mccain?

the boy: well, because one time when you all were watching the presidential press conference i was watching it from my room and i heard john mccain say that obama never really answers the tough questions.

and more:
me to my boss: did you see my email yesterday about needing help lining up speakers for my conference.

him: uh, yeah. i didn't answer it because we need to talk. there is no money. no money anywhere to pay for that.

and this:
the girl: i'm going to try to be more girly. (she says after letting rip one of the loudest most hellacious farts ever)

and later:
the girl: if i was married to someone hot and they got in a car wreck and were ugly i'd divorce them. (yes, you can just imagine how proud i was of that statement).

the boy: dad, what happens when a bee stings you? do they die?
the hubs: yes because their stinger is in you and when they pull away it rips their ass off.
the boy howls w/ laughter
me: (saying under my breath) uh, could you watch the language a bit?
the hubs: oh, sorry, when the bee flies away it pulls off his glutious maximus.

the girl: mom, i have this bump on my face and it hurts when i touch it.
me: (examining it) uh, yep, you have a ZIT

one more i forgot last night:
the boy: well, we can't move to canada.
the girl: why?
the boy: because of the bacon thing.
the girl: what?
the boy: because. they call ham bacon (the boy does not understand (and i guess i don't really either) canadian bacon. it's ham right? it's not bacon. but, it's yummy) and that's just not right.


Astarte said...

I'm sorry, I howled too when I read that the bee's ass gets ripped off!!!! I mean, seriously, that's just funny.

Canadian bacon is indeed ham. Your boy must really like some bacon. :)

Kristin.... said...

LOVING the bacon/ham conversation! What a hoot!

Sherendipity said...

I Canukistani people have normal bacon, as well. And honestly, in Canada, we don't actually call it "Canadian bacon". It's usually called back bacon. And no, it's not ham.
Three different parts of the piggie.

We're not freaks. I promise. Well, we're not all freaks.

creative kerfuffle said...

pig is good unkay? yes, the boy loves some ham/pig/bacon.
sher--i KNEW you could clear that up for me but i'm not sure the boy will get that point. if i tell him back bacon that will open a whole other can of worms i fear : )