Tuesday, July 7, 2009

survival mode

lord, i'm on the brink of slipping into a funk i fear. i'm starting to worry about being able to find a job. really worry. i guess i thought i would have found something, anything after nearly 3 months.

don't get me wrong, if money weren't an issue i'd be digging this stay at home thing.

i am antsy. i want to create something. change something. color something.

we are going to start painting the bedrooms possibly this week.

i want to change the look of the blog too and have looked around a bit online but haven't found anything that jumps out at me. i wish i knew how to manipulate code--i'd design something myself. but, alas, i don't possess that skill.

i am dancing on the very edge of that chasm that could send me spiraling into a full blown funk and i am clawing at anything to keep me on higher ground. i peek over the edge, knowing full well i don't want to end up down there, but also knowing that it is very possible.

i should have noticed the signs. tuning out from blogging. tuning out from music. oddly enough the very things that inspire and move me are the things i turn away from when i'm travelling down that road to a funk. stupid huh?

so--if you know how to spruce up blogs let me know : )

i'm going to attempt to make a peach cobbler for the hubs tonight. maybe that will help keep me from going over the edge for today.

8 comments:

IB said...

Good luck, pal. Sending you whatever strength I have.

a mouthy irish woman? ridiculous! said...

did you tune out from the "tmi" too? thats when you know fo sho....you might need some cialis of some sort or another.

breathe my sister. sending out good vibes and maybe i'll make a gumi bear sacrifice tonight in your honor.

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Walking with my I-suffle on full blast helps get me out of funks....

Hope yours leads you to wherever it is you need to be for that next creative thing to grab you.

Kristin.... said...

I'm right there with you.

ps-funk is my maiden name

not kidding

Penny said...

You describe being on the edge of depression (or a funk) very well.At least that's how it always feels for me as well.I know what's waiting for me,and I know I don't want to be like that,but I also know I maybe won't be able to stop it from happening.I hope that you can find something that can keep you in a good state of mind.

Anonymous said...

I really hope something comes along and shakes you out of your funk, I hate that feeling and I hate knowing I'm slipping into it. tracy

only a movie said...

Hang in there. It is nervewracking knowing what is potentially ahead...
Will be thinking of you.
(A little funky here too).

Hotch Potchery said...

As a funk slider myself, I feel you. I am sending anti-funk thoughts your way!!!!