Thursday, February 24, 2011

today i fell in love...

....with my sister-in-law's mother. the hubs and i have always liked her. she is an incredible grandmother to my niece and nephew so we've always envied that. she actually PLAYS with her grandchildren! the hubs has always joked with my brother that he'd like to trade mils. well, actually he really would but, you know what i mean.

i'm going to call her pie (because she makes awesome pies and she is so damn sweet). pie had surgery last week and i thought it would be nice if i went to visit her. i finally got the chance today.

i was there for three hours. we talked about all sorts of things....the girl going to high school; my sister's upcoming move; my niece and nephew; cats; my sil's sister; our childhoods. i learned so much about her and it felt good to talk to her. i don't know if it's this pre-menopause thing i think i'm going through or what, but i got choked up a few times (and so did she).

i think i am always subconsciously looking for a parental unit. several times through the years i have been drawn to older women i work with or for..like mom-age women...and sort of let myself be taken under their wings. the first real job i had after college brought one such woman into my life. she was actually a friend of my mom's too...but she was my boss and became a good friend. i could talk to her about anything and she was such an incredible woman. i was devastated when she died. my second to last boss was considered a ball breaker by many, but i looked up to her and felt daughterly towards her in a strange kind of way.

i have no idea where this train of thought is going....but i recognize that in life you search for the things you need, even if you don't know it. my sil is lucky to have such a mom.

3 comments:

cheatymoon said...

I totally understand that point of view. Totally. I think that's why when I went shopping for a therapist, I was drawn to someone closer to my mom's age than mine...

The Mayor said...

I'll be your mama. Is 53 old enough to be your mama?

I lost my mom 24 years ago and I miss her like crazy, every single day.

Gal Friday said...

I am a firm believer that you can find "family" in people who are not blood-related to you. Especially if your own relatives are lacking in those qualities you need from them.
I am sure your SIL's Mom feels a bond with you and is glad to have gotten to know you in HER life as well.