Friday, March 19, 2010

girls just want to have fun

the boy and the hubs are on their way to PA for a karate tournament this weekend. the boy is doing so well in karate. i can't even begin to tell you how committed he is to it. it's his thing right now, and possibly for quite awhile. he goes to a class 5-6 days a week. he started in september and he's already a blue belt and he's in the black belt club. which, to me basically means he's REALLY into it and his goal is to get his black belt. and he gets to wear a blue uniform. anyway, this is his first competition and he's stoked. the girl and i stayed behind, partly to keep costs down (and so we didn't have to board the dogs) and partly because she's got the mono. (although, knock on wood, she's showing improvement and has gone to school the last two days.) when i talked to the hubs earlier (it's an 8 hour drive) they were in traffic in dc. the boy was excited to tell me they drove by the washington monument (that big pointy building he said), the lincoln memorial and the capitol building and the presidential copter flew over their car. they hope to be able to stop on the way home sunday and take some pictures.

that leaves the girl and i to our own devices this weekend. i had thought this would be a perfect excuse to have a little friends get together, but honestly not knowing what each day will bring w/ how the girl feels i just can't plan that far in advance. we have decided, last minute, to take in a movie this evening and the SIL is coming w/. we make a great trifecta and i can't wait until bossy butt gets older and we become a foursome : )

as soon as the girl got home from school she was antsy to get the girls' weekend going so we had to go to tarjay, cos her allowance was burning a hole in her pocket. she was overcome w/ excitement because there were 24 cent folders on clearance, and notebooks : ) that's my kid. she admitted to being a school supply hoarder.

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in other news---i took the cowardly way out and emailed my mom today. after last weekend's events i've yet to hear from my dad (not that i expected any differently) and my mom has emailed me each day to check on the girl. i am such a wuss. confrontation drives me nuts and i get my thoughts out better by writing them rather than speaking them anyway. so today i emailed her and basically said i didn't think they understood how serious the situation is. i said my kids will not be around my dad, at all. if she wants to see her grandkids she can come to our house. i did not try to be harsh or hateful, but i told her i'd put up w/ more than any kid ever needed to put up w/ from a parent and i wasn't doing that to my kids.

i am sure she has taken to her bed and will no doubt be sleeping/stressed/depressed all weekend. that is her motis operandi. poor me. my sister is also poised to speak w/ her about taking back custody of her two kids. (my parents have had temporary custody of two of my sister's kids for years partially because they all used to live w/ my folks and partially because of my sister's past emotional roller coaster rides).

that will be the third part of that trifecta--having major confrontations w/ each of your adult children in the the span of three weeks. you'd think that would give someone a clue about their relationships. you'd think one would stop and say, huh, something is totally fucked up here and maybe i need to fix it. though honestly, there are things that can't be fixed amid all of this. my mom will no doubt cry on her sisters' shoulders about how awful her life is, how she tries so hard to get along w/ her kids and they've turned their backs on her, how she's married to a drunk and her life sucks. i used to feel sorry for her. i don't any more. she's sat idly by and let much of what's wrong happen and then looks up, surprised, that her life is the way it is.

1 comment:

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Hope your girls' night is lovely.