today i learned that the publication i worked for, the one that laid me off, has not only hired a person to take my job...they hired the person who had the job before i did. and the position no longer reports to the person i reported to (which was never a good idea anyway) but rather to the big boss himself.
i found out about five minutes ago via fb and then i read the article about it. my emotions are all over the fucking place. of course my first thought is...if they are renewing their commitment to the pub and they're going to have a dedicated person in that role why the hell didn't they hire me back? my second thought is...i think even though i desperately need a job i'm not sure i could comfortably go back there to work. third...they hired her? they were pissed at her and pretty much forced her out and then talked trash about her when she was gone. was i really THAT horrible compared to her? i have mulled this over w/ the hubs and a friend or two...not this particular thing but my being snubbed by them in general...and honestly the only thing i can think of is that the queen of evil (haven't seen THAT name here in years) didn't like me. but, i never got the impression she liked this person either, so that still stumps me.
of course this is a serious blow to the ego. huge. it's bad enough companies that don't know my skills and value aren't hiring me, but now a company that does know me didn't hire me. that will stick in my craw for a long time i can tell you right now.