...and not in any good way. the humidity is driving me insane. seriously makes me want to move to alaska.
things have been a bit hectic i suppose. my freelance work has picked up this week and that is all well and good but limits my ability to do anything w/ the kids. the same kids who are bored out of their minds. the boy has gone over to a friend's house and the girl is lying on the couch reading. she hasn't seen a friend all summer long--but that is a whole post unto itself.
the hubs is back on this kick about what i'm going to do about my folks. i find it touching and admirable that his goal in this is that i not have regrets if/when something happens to them and i haven't reconciled w/ them. knowing how he feels about them and what he thinks of them and how he could go the rest of his life w/out seeing/speaking to them and at the same time realizing that if i did the same i would regret it once they were gone amazes me.
i grasp what he is saying. i even understand that i probably would have regrets if something happened and i hadn't found peace before then. last night i sat down and tried to compose an email to my mom. it sounded flat and heartless. i don't know how to say what i want to say w/out sounding that way. i don't think we need to discuss any of the issues any more--we've tried that time and time again over the years and it never works or changes anything and everyone just ends up venting. it changes nothing. i don't know what type of relationship i want w/ them. i know i do not want to spend a lot of time w/ them. i know that i will have my guard up. i know that i don't trust them or like them.