tis little friday

(a girl in our office calls thursday little friday--i thought it was cute)

so just a bit of morning randomness as i'm drinking my coffee and gearing up to actually work.

the hubs got to come home yesterday after all--so i slept very well thank you. he even brought us a much needed herbal remedy that we'd been lacking for some time now.

my new laptop came in. holy crap it makes me realize how little i actually know about technology. it's not yet hooked up to the internet. it's pretty though : ) it's red. the hubs' is supposed to arrive today and he knows even less about technology. i think we'll have to get my bro to come over soon and teach us how to use our computers : ) he he.

aside from really needing his for work at this point, the hubs also wants to start writing. he has two books in mind--life with creative kerfuffle and the world according to the hubs (these are just working titles mind you). i told him it would be truly funny if he ends up being the one in the family to be the published author rather than me. if that does happen we would be living the other's dream. when he was in high school his dream was to become a journalist. my life dream is to write a good book.

i have to give a few shout outs--my friend trish just celebrated her bday. happy bday big t. she's been a rock in my life (as in someone i can always turn to) for quite some time and i love her a lot. the other shout out is to broad's son, the spawn, who just turned three. he absolutely has the most gorgeous curly hair and blue eyes i've ever seen on a little boy. plus, when i'm around him he acts like he likes me so that's a plus ; )

i liked astarte's comment (see one of the recent posts, i can't dig it up right now) about life not being half over at 40 cos basically nothing really counts until 15 or so : ) i'm really not lamenting turning 40 so much. i mean yes, it does stick in my mind cos society has programmed that in to all of us--the milestones as it were. but i don't feel 40--not that i know what that would feel like. i guess more than anything it just makes me realize i have so much left i want to do in life and why oh why am i wasting it doing what i'm doing? (cos i'm a chicken shit and don't like change and am scared i can't do anything else and have insurance and get paid for it or that it will be even worse than what i'm doing now).

so--another thing i haven't written much about but that i think about every single day is that there has been no reconcilliation between me and my friend. it's like the proverbial white elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about. i really do not know what else to do and honestly folks, at this point i'm not even sure i want to do anything about it. i'm not trying to bad mouth her at all and the thing i hate is that we have many common friends (and i don't think it's a huge secret at this point that we aren't talking, people pick up on things like that. i just haven't spilled the beans about the reason) and i don't want them to be in the middle of any of this, but for me it's really gone beyond what the arguement was about and now it's about the fact that our friendship means so little to her that she's not willing to make any effort to work it out. if i were being true to myself (and to the fact that i started this blog to journal in) there would be myriad posts about this because it really is always in my thoughts. but i'm sure vomiting all of that out here where my IRL friends (and possibly she) would read it just would not be good. suffice it to say i go between being heartbroken, pissed off and stunned.

to end on a lighter note---
yesterday when i picked the kids up from daycare the boy had to show me his chalk drawing on the daycare patio. he is quite the artist, for real, he can draw. so he drew this he-man looking guy, big muscles, small torso, loin cloth with a strong stance. the boy was proud. until we looked down and someone had drawn a penis coming out from underneath the loincloth with a stream of blue chalk shooting out of it and puddling at the he-man's feet. the boy was PISSED. "i even signed my name to it and now someone put a penis on it and the counselors are going to think i did it!" he said. "they put a penis on my drawing!"