The week in review

Did ya miss me? Of course you did--where else would you get such wit and wisdom? : ) Don't answer that!

I’ve been out for awhile. Lots going on. Leah and Keely escaped from the backyard last Tuesday and our lives have been on hold. We’ve come home every evening to drive around and look for them and just when we’d give up hope we’d get a call (we put up fliers) that someone had seen them.

They left our neighborhood and went cavorting around in a big ass cookie cutter neighborhood across the street. You know the ones, where all the houses pretty much look the same and they your neighbor is right up your butt? I’m sure they’re all starting to think we’re casing the neighborhood.

The Hubs was getting ready to go out looking for them this morning and put up more fliers when he looked out the back door and they there were. We’d left the gate open in the hopes they’d find their way home and they did. Leah was in her dog house and Keely was lying beside it—she’s either too stubborn or too retarded to get in her own dog house so she sleeps beside Leah.

Crisis averted and they’re home.

As if that weren’t enough to deal with the tooth that I was supposed to have a root canal on last year but didn’t because I’m a total wuss when it comes to going to the dentist, flared up and I thought I was going to die. I tried Tylenol and though it made me sleepy it did not help the pain. I was then turned on to large amounts of ibuprofen. Let me tell you, if you ever have severe pain, take four of those bad boys and it will knock it right out. I self medicated for about a week, my appointment was yesterday. I was lethargic and not very productive during that time, but pain free.

The appointment was the best experience I’ve ever had at a dentist. They gave me nitrous. That is like a miracle gas or something. I get nervous, like I’m going to cry and throw up, just walking into a dentist office.

I sat in the chair, clutching it until my knuckles turned white and then he popped that gas mask on me. Sweet relief. Thanks to a topical numbing agent I didn’t even feel the three shots of Novocain he gave me, which lasted until after 5pm yesterday. It’s hard to smoke a cigarette (or drink anything) when half of your face is numb—but trust me, I persevered.

While I was in the chair floating high on nitrous I had several thoughts. First, the dentist must be cool because his Muzac was classic rock—-I even heard a Rod song while under the gas; at least I think I did.

Second, if you have a business where you either charge a buttload for your services or your product, the people who work in your business should use proper grammar. I hate me some red neck talkin’ office people.

Third, if anyone ever invents noiseless dental equipment they'll make millions. Half the battle for me is the noise--it freaks me out. That and the pain of course.

The dogs are home and my tooth is ok. Now if I can just get the Hubs to take his medicine and not kick the bucket on me in the near future life will indeed be good.